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Fear and self-doubt are very normal emotions to have. They are protective mechanisms that have been hardwired into our brains to protect us. If you had no fear, you wouldn’t be watching this video right now, because you’d probably be... dead.
In this episode, I talk about some of the biggest obstacles standing between you and the amazing content we both know you are capable of delivering. Those obstacles are fear and self-doubt. I am also going to give you some tips for dealing with those fears and doubts.
So let’s talk about fear and self-doubt. As I said; fear and self-doubt are very normal emotions to have, designed to protect us. So the fear and self-doubt we experience are not harmful to us but constantly surrendering to them eats away at our self-confidence.
Do any of these scenarios sound familiar to you?
You fail to speak up in a conversation because you fear your opinion and by implication, you will be rejected.
You attend a brainstorming session and have several ideas in your head, but don’t say a word because you’re scared the others will think your ideas suck.
You have a truly inspiring idea for a new business you know could improve your life and that of others but you don’t act on it because you are super scared of failure.
For many people, and I used to be one of them, surrendering to fear and self-doubt has become habitual behavior. The problem is that every time we fail to act due to fear and self-doubt we damage our levels of self-confidence and the less likely it becomes that we’ll act in the future.
This is a terrible habit with a downward spiral resulting in people eventually believing that being a “wimp” is just who I am. Being a wimp becomes part of their identity and they give up on their dreams and settle for a life of mediocrity.
So how do we deal with self-doubt and fear?
Ralph Waldo Emerson said:
"He who is not everyday conquering some fear has not learned the secret of life."
Conquer everyday fear. How do you conquer the fear? I used to believe that the best way to conquer fear is to see it as the enemy and to go to war with it. I actually made a video about it. In the short term, it worked for me, because taking up arms that will energize you. You are on this mission. Fight, fight, fight. But in the long term that is not a good strategy. Because the fears and doubts don't go away, which means you’ll always be at war with yourself.
Recently I have come to believe that inner peace is probably the most precious state humans can possess. So, I changed my tactics and the way I deal with it now is to see fear and self-doubt as allies. Because that is what they are. They just want to protect us. They are our friends. They are just not our smartest friends and they are very irrational.
Remember that they live in a very primitive part of the brain called the amygdala. It’s not the amygdala’s job to analyze and rationalize what we feel. It will try to stop you from doing what you intend to every time it’s triggered.
Now, whenever I feel fear and doubt are holding me back I’d call them out. I’d say hey fear and doubt. I know you just wanna keep me safe. However, my life is not in danger and therefore I need to act.
The not-so-secret ingredient here is courage. Muster all your courage and ACT. Relentless, courageous action. That is the answer.
Every brave action will contribute a little to your levels of confidence and make you more likely to act in the future. When you no longer surrender to the fear, the downward spiral will start moving up. You will no longer be a “wimp”, but an action taker and your own hero.
As creators or aspiring creators, we must be brave and act. We must put our content out there. It’s scary, but it's the only way.
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